just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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