I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
