If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
