i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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