We won't sleep together?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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