Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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