I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Randomize