HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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