This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
not ubering you a puppy
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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