That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
