it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
