How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
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