I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize