Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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