Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
