problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
