Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
