hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
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