im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize