wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize