We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
He kissed a someone with a penis
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
