is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize