Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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