Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
