And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
