I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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