dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Randomize