He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
