plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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