you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
