sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
