I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
