So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Randomize
