Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
