I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
