the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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