Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
