They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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