Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
