I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
