I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
