Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Randomize
