ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Randomize
