I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
