I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
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