Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize