Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
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