She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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