mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
