He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
that is very illegal...i love you.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
