So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
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